Jealousy

It can kill.

They say LOVE is never jealous; nor selfish. That's why it is so hard to love.

How can one not be jealous if the person s/he loves is owned by another? Who would consider his/her feelings? Who's being selfish? 

Love is but a stressful emotion. You love to feel happy yet you end up in pain. You love to be taken seriously yet it turns out to be a game. How can you love when all you do is batter each other's heart with lies and broken promises? You set high hopes and fall deeply only to find out that you are about to hit the ground; seeing that nobody is down there to catch you. But there's nothing you can do but to take the fall. 

I fell for love many times now; sad to say I am still counting. I feel so stupid loving someone who is tied in a relationship. Enjoying each other's company and having blissful moments are memories to keep. My heart was completely set that this romance will not last; knowing his heart is with someone else. Unfortunately, it turns out that I cannot help but fall for him. I loved him ever since teenage years. 

How can love be so cruel? Why can't we be with the one we love? Why does it have to be so complicated? 

I am now doubting my ability to love; am I able to love genuinely?

Am I worthy to be loved?

1711

1711

I stayed in this room since June 8. I am here for a seminar/training til June 25. 

My room mate is Michelle Veloso; I call her Maike. She's from Cagayan de Oro. She's cute and bubbly. She has this sweet tone of voice. She is fun to be with and I enjoy her company. She's my teacher; she sets curfew when it comes to TV time. You see, everyday, we have an exam and she reminds me to study every night. I learn from her; Maike would discuss the module and I listen to her. I could not imagine my scores if ever I did not have her as my room buddy. We get good scores but still, we aim for higher ranks. We laugh about random stuffs. She's a camera shy person but I always insist. :)  She is my alarm clock and my check-list. 

That's Maike covered in her blanket. :)

On weekends or free-time, we go to Market Market to look for affordable clothes. One thing I like about her is her simplicity. Rarely would I hear her complain--unless we are already hungry. :)   I will surely miss her when our training ends. I am glad that I share the room with her. :)

We bought the same black shorts; sort of a remembrance... :)

Well, if ever she gets to read this, I'd really like to say "Maike, thank you for being sweet and nice. Thanks for the company and I hope you will never forget the fun times... :) thanks for helping me cross the streets... and lots more... I am glad that I met you... :) Thanks mucho!" 

We  only have a week now; and I feel kind of a dramatic... haha.. 

fin

Makati City

MAKATI CITY-- a busy place. Lights everywhere. It is as if people never sleep in this city.

At St. Giles Hotel, roof deck, we took some random shots of the city lights. 

Sea of Lights

See how busy they are. This was taken at around 2am; still there's medium traffic.

The night lights amuse me.

LEGO. The buildings looked like Lego from here. 

I am here for a seminar. The hotel has 35 floors. The city is busy and I feel stressed out. It's good to be here but I cannot imagine myself wanting to live here. Traffic is heavy, polluted streets, busy people, stressful lifestyle. But seeing such scenery; even watching streetlights bring out the art in this city. I loved it. 

Summer Sarap

Summer ends with a splash… With my officemates, we spent our summer outing at 

Zamboanga Ecozone Mar Y Monte Nature and Water Park… 

The day was freakin’ hot yet the sun can’t stop us from having fun… :) here’s a little something I made…

Sadly, some could not join the FUN due to work and commitments. 

EastWest Bank Zamboanga Summer Outing 2011

Unfathomable.

I found myself wandering inside my thoughts. I could not find a place to stay-put. I kept walking; trying to find light--an escape. I am drowned by stress and I cannot find him. He's lost and so am I. If only I know how to find him, maybe I could find my way out. I am disturbed; thunderclaps came rolling and it haunts me. I ran into random directions and I stumble--I fell. I cried; "Where are you?" He said he won't leave me. I heard it--it's coming. I crept sideways trying to hold on to something--it's coming. Tears fell like rain as I watched the water approach me like a beast chasing its prey. I closed my eyes and I felt cold. I could not remember how I got here; all I know is I was looking for him. Dry land; I'm soaking wet on dry land. I shiver and I am alone. I can feel my heart breaking. Then I searched for him; I longed for him. I am good as blind; darkness took away my sight. I am weak. "Where are you?"

I felt my knees on the ground. I cannot go any further now. I am tired. He's gone. He left me. "Please let me go" I screamed; silence and emptiness--they kill me. I am good as dead; if only I could hear your voice--but I can't. I begged for light--I passed out.

I am trapped in my thoughts...only you can release me...please set me free.